Ads don’t usually get my goat. I mean unless it’s a Victoria’s Secret and I can’t even be bothered paying attention to who’s trying to sell me what. Neither am I of fanatical bent – like who cares whether bikes run mirrors or crash guards as long as the rider is wearing a lid. And as for a spot of wheelie-ing and stunting, I can’t get enough of it.
But then along comes an ad like that new Mountain Dew thing where the main protagonists drown their fears in the fizzy brew and barrel down the hillside in a Gypsy. Supposedly the brew makes them very brave. Looks plain bloody stupid to me.
Apparently those jokers are in a rally, something that looks like the Raid, but in a Gypsy without a roll cage, without seat belts and not even wearing helmets. Like I said, I’m not a fanatic, but what sort of message do ads like these send out?
Don’t mistake me for one to preach about effectiveness of a good ad script – I couldn’t care less – but really would it kill the script if the heroes were to wear seat belts? And helmets? Would it have killed the director to do his homework and see how an actual rally is run? What an actual rally car looks like? How drivers get thrown out for taking short cuts?
We’re not fools you know, fools to insist on wearing seat belts and helmets. It saves lives, mine on more than one occasion. It’s why I get so mad to see such flippant advertising being beamed into my home, such nonsense being consumed by today’s children. And it’s especially frustrating when, without much more effort, the same ad could have been both socially responsible and an endorsement for motorsport while not deviating one bit from its primary objective – of encouraging more people to buy aforementioned brew.
Motorsport, especially rallying, lends itself beautifully to stunning visuals. That Safari ad, the SUV jumping in slow-mo, going full sideways on dirt, what an ad that was! Were I not a road tester and had I eight lakh buckaroos to spare that ad would have been enough to sell me a Safari. And isn’t that what advertising is all about? Selling you something you never, ever, will want or need?
A fast paced rally ad would have taken little effort; god knows there are enough rally cars and drivers who’d give an arm and a leg to get on the airwaves. And it’s not like all rally drivers are Frankensteins – dudes like Gaurav Gill are proper bankable stars.
But still nobody cares. Save for the two traditional tyre guys there are no new sponsors in racing. Major car and bike manufacturers don’t consider racing as means of promoting their products; they’d rather throw money at eleven grown men chucking, smacking and chasing a little red ball round a rather big lawn.
Why? It’s not like we win too many of those games. And it’s not like the form of those boys in blue is any testimony on how good ‘x’ or ‘y’ bike is. No, what will make a difference is if ‘x’ bike beats ‘y’ bike on the track over the weekend. Only a fool would buy a ‘y’ now, wouldn’t they? ‘Win on Sunday, sell on Monday’, it’s something that has yet to catch on in this country.
Then somebody wakes up and decides to base their ad on a rally. And makes a complete sham out things. I say we get a bit militant about this - put up kart and autocross tracks on every cricket ground in the country and smack anybody who shoves a fizzy drink into our faces.
